“Go Away, Noah!” + Other Things I Yell at the TV While Watching “The Affair”

After binging “ER”, I remembered one big thing about Jacki in the early 2000s:

She LOVED Maura Tierney. 

Between “ER” and “Newsradio”, she was an actress I’ve always respected, but I kind of forgot about her. She could do drama, she could do comedy and she was always believable AF and I related to her in some way in almost every role she’s taken. 

So, I started watching “The Affair” (Showtime) solely to keep her on my screen. 

But then I stayed for the Joshua Jackson. 

Oof, that sounds thirsty and is not at all true, but I am leaving “The Affair” with a brand new talent crush on him and am gonna seek out another show to keep him on my screen after this one. I’m open to suggestions. =)

What I really hung around for was the unique storytelling mechanism. 

Have you ever seen that Kevin Bacon/Elizabeth Perkins movie “He Said, She Said”?

It’s basically that but a prestige drama. You get to see a story from different perspectives. 

The nuances are fantasitcally done and it’s pretty wonderful to see the subtle differences in scenes from different points of view. 

The acting is impeccable, but I don’t think this is a show I will rewatch once I finish (I’m on season 5 now), nor do I think I will recommend this show to anyone else. 

It feels weird to say that about a show that’s as well done as this one, but there is one character that just makes this watch a slog for me. 

I hate Noah (played incredibly well by Dominic West). HATE him. I don’t want him anywhere near my Helen (Tierney), my Cole (Jackson) or my damn television screen. 

 Characters from "The Affair" on Showtime

Like, thankfully I am home alone right now because my evenings sound like this:

 “SHUT UP, NOAH”

“UGH NO ANOTHER NOAH STORYLINE”

“FUCK YOOOOOOOOOOOU, NOAH”

“UGH GROSS NOAH IS SPILLING OVER INTO MY COLE TIME”

“NOAH!!!! GIVE IT A DAMN REST!!!!!! JESUS!”

I’m vocal about my hatred for Noah. And I think what I am most bothered about is something he does (possibly unknowingly) to all the women he’s doing the sex on. 

He chooses to spend time with these vibrant, lovely and ALIVE women and just sucks the light out of them throughout the duration of the time he spends with them. 

You know how your kitchen sponge slowly dries up and becomes all gross and curled up in on itself? And then it’s no good so you have to throw it out and buy a new one? That’s what Noah does to women. 

Hell, that’s what Noah does to people. I can’t think of one person in this show who is, by any measure, a better person having spent time with Noah. 

His second wife, Alison, who is played incredibly by Ruth Wilson, gets the short end of the stick in my opinion, because her story is so tied into to Noah. I get frustrated with her story when he’s involved, because she could be SO GREAT without him. 

It’s wild to me how one character can completely sour me on a show, but Noah Solloway will go down in history as one of my least favorite fictional characters of all time. And that’s a hard list to make, cause while I love loving things, I’m really trying NOT to spread hate whenever possible. 

But Noah deserves it. 100%

Have you watched this show? Did you also hate Noah? Talk to me!!!!

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