I Know I’m Becoming an “Old” for One Reason

This happens every single day without fail, no matter where I am. 

It’s how I know how to get out of bed in the morning. 

I could be the sleepiest bean in the pot but when this one thing starts happening, there’s no way at all I could remain in the cozy warmth of the, um, boiling soup? 

Look, I couldn’t figure out how to keep that metaphor going. If you can do better, I’d love to hear it cause I really painted myself into a corner there. 

“Sleepiest bean in the bean pot”?T WTF even is that? I do not know. 

But I can picture it. Well, not picture it, but imagine it. 

(this is a quick drawing I did since I couldn’t picture it myself and I wanted to)

What’s the sleepy bean’s name?

I think she’s Bobbi. And she’s been doing a lot of work lately. 

But it’s the kind of work that no one sees. 

People tend to overlook thinking as a draining activity, but Bobbi the sleepy bean does a lot it. 

And it drains her. 

So she’s a sleepy bean. 

All the other beans are all excitable and happy and can’t understand why Bobbi is so sleepy all the time. 

However, they also understand that they don’t NEED to understand the reason why Bobbi the Sleepy Bean is so exhausted. They just need to accept her and embrace her just as she is. 

Because when she’s not sleepy? Bobbi’s the life of the party! She just needs more time to recharge than the other beans. 

It’s fine. Every bean is different. 

Look. I dunno what that sidebar was. I guess, welp, it’s a good example of the nonsense running through my brain at any given time. 

The inside of my brain is SOMETHING, y’all. 

What was I even talking about?

Oh, yeah, getting old. 

Every morning I get out of bed when my left hip won’t stop hurting. 

That’s how I know it’s time to get up and get moving. 

Let me field the main question that I am sure you must have:

Is the left hip the one that you sleep on?

Yes! It is, but even if I wake up and turn over to sleep on my other side, my left hip still aches. That’s how I know it’s time to get up and not just keep sleeping. See? If it stops hurting when I roll over, I know it’s not time to get up yet.  

This isn’t a luxury I’ve had for most of my life. Normally, I’d have to get up when the alarm interrupted my dreams. So maybe my hip always did me hurt and I never noticed it cause I was never getting enough sleep?

It’s wild just how much capitalism and the need to produce and consume affects our lives in ways I normally don’t even think of. 

    But I don’t think I always had this hip hurt-y alarm system. I think it came with being an “old”. I hate it though, cause sometimes I’m the coziest bean in the bean pot and I don’t want to get out. 


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