The only thing I always knew that I wanted to do when I was a kid was write. Write what? I did not know, I just knew it was something I loved to do that came naturally to me.
When I was in school I’d spend my downtime writing free form word association “notes” that I would randomly give to a classmate. It was just the nonsense that was swirling around my brain in between the facts and figures and I needed to get it out.
I didn’t want those notes for myself, so I gave them away.
That’s basically what I feel like I’m doing here, in a more grown-up manner, on my blog. I try to let the word vomit fall and not edit it too terribly much. I think there is not enough free-ness when it comes to the written word on the Internet. You know just willy nilly words thrown out without as much as a self-edit.
But that’s a blog for another time.
Today I want to talk about a skill I didn’t realize I had until the last few years: making pitch decks.
When I first broke off and started my freelance journey, one of my first projects was a presentation for a Wellness conference for a Medical Marijuana doctor that I knew. I had dabbled in presentations with previous jobs, but they were very straightforward and simple.
I also felt quite limited in what I could do creatively, so they were also pretty boring.
When I struck out on my own, I got guts or something because I was representing no one but myself and had a pretty good idea of who I was (HAHA – I did not).
So, when I created the presentation for a client early in my freelance career, I created two versions: the “boring” sort that I had become used to creating for my previous corporate jobs and a “creative” one that let the presenter’s personality really shine through.
She picked the creative one and had very few notes. It felt good.
Now, fast-forward four years, and I’ve been to therapy, done almost 600 Morning Pages, and really know myself on a level I never have before. I’m also working with clients who share my values and appreciate all the weird quirks in my brain.
They are an asset, not something to “deal with” or “handle” or “make fun of,” which is how I have felt for most of my life.
One of those clients is Only In Your State, where I get to write about small businesses that are owned by humans doing things they love. I can write 500+ words about the Queer Chocolatier and so many articles about Black-Owned businesses who scream from the rooftops that “Black Lives Matter” and not get a text message that tells me not to because “there are people in the company that don’t necessarily agree with that message.”
In fact, my Queer Chocolatier piece was pinned to the front of the Indiana page for a hot minute. It felt like a celebration. And I know that by making money by writing words, Middle School Jacki is celebrating too!
My other client is EngErotics, which last year let me host a whole series about my favorite television show despite having never even seen an episode themselves. I also helped them with a pitch deck for a pretty big retail chain.
Y’all – this was one of the most fun (non-writing, non-art) things I’ve done. But then I thought about it — It’s both writing AND art. Then we met with a very high-level person, and the deck got compliments. I could speak intelligently without worrying that I was saying the wrong thing.
I was confident. I knew what I did was good and it felt so good to have folks at that level recognize it.
Another thing aside from writing that I’ve been confident in most of my life? My taste in movies.
I mean, I worked at Blockbuster- of course, my movie taste is elite.
In the 90s, I was a Miramax gal through and through. 1996 and 1997 were my favorite years with Big Night, The Last Supper, and The House of Yes. Now, I’m an A24 and Neon gal with my fingers crossed that there aren’t Weinstein types hiding in their ranks.
I 100% passed this incredible taste in movies to my child, who y’all know as D.
I had her young and didn’t know who I was or what I liked or wanted to be or how to do any of it. But I did know what movies I liked, so I felt confident in passing that knowledge along.
The first movie she saw in the theaters was Mulan, and I think I got more joy out of watching her fall in love with the movies than I did watching the actual film.
My other favorite formative movie moment from her childhood came after I had left my husband. This is a thing I would not have done without her. He was out of town for my birthday on a trip to Vegas. She and I were sitting at a Waffle House eating grilled cheeses and hashbrowns—things that weren’t allowed when my husband was home.
She looked at me and said, “It could be like this all the time,” and something in my brain broke (in a good way.)
She was right. I didn’t have to spend my life as a burden to my family, who finally shuffled me off to be a burden to someone else, which is what that marriage felt like. It felt like someone owned me, and I was theirs, but not in the way that is sexy or hot (or only relegated to bedroom things).
And what’s more, she didn’t have to spend her life thinking that this is the way things were supposed to be.
It was a random night. We were settled into our new life even though there was little more than a couch, a television, and a bookshelf in the living room and even less in all the other rooms. It was late-ish, and a school night, so I was trying to get her to sleep.
Of course, D was not having it.
So I put on what I thought would be a boring movie for her. Not a lot of action, no bright colors and a whole lot of talking.
She was entranced and didn’t go to bed until the movie ended. I remember seeing her big eyes taking in all the magic on the small screen. She understood what made this movie special, and it made me weirdly proud.
The movie was Brick and I think it’s still one of her top ten to this day.
In her 10th grade year, she wrote a short play for school. I was so proud when I went to see it, mostly because it was so well-written but also a little bit because hers was the only play with a curse word.
The Oscars are our favorite holiday. I don’t really miss her on Christmas, but every year I wish she was here for the Academy Awards. I’d even include a gift exchange nowadays -themed, of course.
So, D has spent most of her post-school years in the arts. She went to college for dance and then moved to NYC where she bopped around for a little while. Then she went to Oregon on vacation and fell in love and it’s been her home ever since.
One thing that has remained constant throughout all of that is her writing. From stories to scripts and everything in between, the words just flow out of her. I’m glad that she is not repeating the same cycle that I was taught, which was to get a man and keep him at all costs, no matter how you are hurting yourself.
She knew that she had value, too, and helped me learn that about myself. It’s not fair at all that she didn’t get a mom with a healthy brain when she needed it most.
I tried to do a good job of putting her in communities with people who were stronger than me, and it has obviously paid off.
D’s the one writing movies (and television!) now. Last year, she self-funded her first short film project… with the help of some of my readers and friends, even!
She has been working hard to make a name for herself in the screenwriting community. I read each piece she sends me with a thirst and excitement. The thirst is for good writing, and the excitement is the same kind I feel when I see a good trailer.
I’m excited to see the movie! Or TV show! Or short! Or whatever!
Part of this hard work has included entering competitions and applying for filmmakers’ grants and similar grants. One of these required a pitch deck for the project.
So she asked me if I could make her one, so I did!
We had a few back-and-forth rounds of editing, but it didn’t need much. Her story and vision were so strong that it was easy for me to see them.
Yes, even with Aphantasia. It’s gonna make a great show, y’all.
My kid is cooler and more sure of herself than I’ll ever be, even though I’m working on it every single day. It ain’t easy, y’all. But the things that are worth it often aren’t, you know?
I don’t know how to end this blog, so I’ll just say this: Do you have a pile of money lying around that you’d like to spend on the arts? Let me know, and we’ll help my kid make her dreams come true!
