Riddle Me This: How is the Super Bowl Any Different Than the Oscars?

I mean aside from the obvious “der” answer of “sports”, but aside from that it ain’t that different. 

Right? Like, I’m not seeing something here that’s not, am I?

Ok, let me tell you where I’m coming from first.

From the home(s) I grew up in with my parents up to the minute I moved in with Mickey, I’d been made to feel guilty (and made fun of, a lot) for watching awards shows obsessively – including my lead up activities of watching movies and reading every possible word I could access about the event. 

I was into it. Like I still am today. My love for awards shows is one of the constants in my life. I told Mickey the other day, “My life’s work is awards shows and candy!”

And I wasn’t wrong. Nor am I embarrassed about it. 

I think that’s because my embarrassment must have run out. I reached my limit. Burned through that bullshit real quick – ok, not really quick. It took a lot of internal work, figuring out which parts of me are really me and which ones are the things I thought I was “supposed” to be to make the people around me happy. 

Unmasking is HARD y’all. 

However, this morning, it did help me come to the realization that my love for an awards show is not that much different than what seems like an entire nations’ obsession with a single football game.

I mean – let’s look at this, starting with something I already touched on a bit:

Are there folks obsessing over the stats for the entire time leading up to both the Academy Awards and the Super Bowl? 

OMG yes. There are Vegas odds for both, too!

Do both I and hardcore football fans spend weeks watching screens leading up to the big day, so they can know who to root for properly? You know, spending entire days watching big screens showing little “games” leading up to the “big game”? (In the case of the Oscars, the little games could be either potential nominees or other, “lesser”, awards shows.)

Yes. (but also, obviously, the only real “lesser” awards show is the Globes, which I don’t even bother to watch live anymore – or write out completely).

Are both the Superbowl and the Oscars massive spectacles that basically take over the television in whatever location we’re watching?

Why yes they are! And I plan to watch both this year!

Are there musical numbers involved in both of these spectacles? 

Yes! And if Naatu Naatu isn’t performed, I’m personally gonna be mega pissed. I mean performed at the Oscars, of course. Although, if they choose to perform it at the Bowl of Supers I would I also be pretty stoked. But I do not see that happening?

Is there almost always some sort of scandal because of unhappy fans?

I mean, duh. There are winners! (and I guess losers too, but if they made it to the fucking Superbowl or the Academy Awards, it’s very difficult for me to not consider them winners of a certain flavor.) People hate it when their shirts don’t win. And I personally have had Oscar grudges that I’ve held onto for years:

Tommy Lee Jones, I’m looking at you – you should NOT have won for “The Fugitive”! That was obviously a “body of work” award and it should have gone home with Leonardo DiCaprio for “What’s Eating Gilbert Grape?”.

I will not waver on this. I feel as passionately about this topic as my friend Aubrey does about the Philadelphia Eagles. She is currently in an RV on the way from Florida to Philly and I know she is just having the time of her life. 

I used to want to make a similar pilgrimage to the Academy Awards one year, but that has kind of worn off. Now I want to produce them. I think I am uniquely qualified, so if you hear of any awards shows looking for a producer, throw them my way. I need to build up my resume! 

I mean, I’ve already got two fully produced awards shows under my belt! I probably only need like five more of increasingly larger sizes and then the Academy will hire me, right?

However, if you have a ticket to the Independent Spirit Awards, I will go buy some new drip and be your date. I will never not want to attend that awards show. It’s the dream. 

Honestly, I’d rather produce that one than the Oscars, too! I feel like Film Independent is doing more important work than the Academy. These days especially.  

Oh here is another important question I will ask you to see if these two events are similar!

Is there special food involved? 

I mean, I feel like “Super Bowl Eats” is the most American category of food that ever existed. What’s more American than a spread of meat and snacks? 

And then the Oscars has the aftershow dinner catered by Woflgang Puck every year. Plus, if you’ve ever been to one of my Oscar parties, you know that the Best Pic Nominee Food Spread is always epic. 

Even though I’m not having a party this year, I have done some thinking about what I’d serve for some of the best pic nominees. I feel like that’s a blog post for later, though. 

I mean, I haven’t been feeling very write-y lately, unless I am writing about awards shows, so I’ma keep that ish going until I get my momentum back!

Oh and one final similarity between the two – they both celebrate booze as well. The Oscars has that free flowin’ champagne for the richies attending the show. The Super Bowl, however, asks the pooros to buy massive amounts of cheap bear to consume while they watch the game from home or a friend’s party. Then there’s pricey beer at the stadium for the richies that can afford to attend!

Are the commercials a big deal for both? (okay I guess that wasn’t the final one)

Yeah, buddy, they are. Not as big a deal as they used to be, since they all hit the YouTubes before the actual Super Bowl nowadays. And commercials are not quite as big of a deal at the Oscars, but oftentimes there are trailer reveals for big movies or potential nominees for the next year. 

And lots of perfume commercials for some reason. Idk what that is about even. 

So, in conclusion, I’m pretty confused about why I got shit on constantly for loving the Oscars during the bulk of my life!

It’s not that different from the festival of weird-shaped balls!

So, maybe do me this favor… next time you feel compelled to rag on someone or make fun of someone for something that they are truly passionate about… take a step back and ask yourself what you’re trying to accomplish by doing it. 

And if your ultimate goal is to tell the person who is excited about something, “Oh it’s not my thing, but I’m glad you enjoy it.” I think it is important for you to know that when you say something like that, it can feel very condescending to the person on the receiving end. 

Here’s how I have flipped the compulsion to chime in like that because I want to be a part of my friend’s excitement:

“OMG, I love how into this you are. I’ve never really cared about the Super Bowl before, but I’m 100% rooting for the Eagles just to support your love for them! And I was born in Kansas City, soo…”

The difference is focusing on their excitement vs. your non-interest in the topic. Again, only if you want to join in on the excitement! If not, then maybe just sftu on the topic altogether.

So, again I ask, what are you trying to accomplish? If it’s just an excuse to inject yourself into conversation then find something valuable to say about the topic – or ask a question! 

That’s the best advice I can give – if someone you love truly LOVES something and they keep on talking about it and you want to be a part of it… ask them a question about it! 

Here are some simple starters:

  • What are you most excited about for the Oscars/Super Bowl?
  • I love that you are so passionate about this! Do you remember how your passion started?
  • Do you have a favorite Oscars/ Super Bowl memory?

I started that list and on the first bullet point my brain seemed to completely forget what a good question was, much less how to ask one, so I feel like those are really lame examples.

But the point remains the same – people love talking about things they love. AND when people they love ask them a question about a topic they love… and give them space to answer to the full breadth of their excitement, it means a whole fucking lot. 

So, I dunno, I guess I’m back to my rallying cry of “LET PEOPLE LOVE THINGS.”

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