Welp, They Can’t All Be Winners

I am sad to report that one of the things I recently tested for myself did not pan out. 

I still try to use it every now and again, but it’s just not for me. 

When this happens, I always feel so guilty. Like I let the “thing” down. 

It’s even worse when someone recommends something to me and it doesn’t work out. I tend to feel that is a problem with me and not the product. And I hate telling them it didn’t work for me. 

But this sleep bonnet did not. 

Let me explain why I bought it first. 

I do not like things in my face: breath, hands, random hairs, SWEAT. Nothing. Never touch my face. Not even with permission, because that will be a socially awkward lie. 

Just don’t touch it. Got it?

My hair is getting kind of longer and I’m trying to decide what to do with it. I have enjoyed the short choppiness of it all and just cutting whenever I feel like it, where ever I feel like and just seeing what happens. 

But I also feel like sinking into my femininity for a while and having longer hair. 

I guess other people can wear wigs and they just feel like their normal hair. I’m always readjusting and it never feels secure on my very large head, so that’s not really an option for me. 

So, if I want long hair, I gotta grow it my dang self. Luckily, the gross nutrition cubes have sped up this process ridiculously. I can’t keep up with my hair or nail growth lately. I feel like I cut my toenails every week now!

I mean I guess that’s a good problem to have.

But at nighttime, when I turn my face fan on, my hair blows around all wildly, tickling my face. 

I hate it. It keeps me from falling asleep. 

So, last time Mickey was out of town, I bought myself a sleep bonnet to test out. I had avoided doing this for a long time, because I thought it would make me sweat! There is very little sensations I dislike more than sweating. 

I am happy to report that it did not, it was cool for sleeping and quite comfortable. 

Inevitably, though, I’d end up ripping it off somehow throughout the night and tossing it to the floor and then the face fan got up to it’s same old antics again.

I also never felt like I could get all the hairs into it. Like, there’d always be wily ones escaping and it was the wily ones I always had the most trouble with.  

And then sometimes the slippy satin would graze my face in the same way my hairs did, so it was kind of defeating the purpose. 

So I stopped using it because it seemed pointless. 

I look at it guiltily every night when I go to bed and think about using it. Sometimes I’ll even try to put it on, but then the hairs don’t right and I get frustrated and have to deal with that feeling before going to sleep too. 

Anyone have a solution I haven’t thought of? If I braid it, my hair breaks too much, so that’s out. I think I just have to deal with the wily hairs forever. 


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